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| Moonscape – ready for grouting |
I am realising that how I feel internally is not necessarily related to how much I achieved (or didn’t) or how many steps forward I took (or didn’t take). I actually achieved a fair amount this week…my commission is finished, just needs grouting (and I am really, really pleased with how it turned out). I have done lots of prep for my mosaic workshops at the Skylark Gallery next week (which I am looking forward to). I am discussing my next commission with a client (a very exciting project). All is well.
But somehow my feeling of being sharp, focussed, sparky and full of creative energy has eluded me. It started two weeks ago with a blanket of deep exhaustion that would fall on me every afternoon. It’s got a bit better but hasn’t quite lifted. I have been short tempered and snappy with my children (they are at that stage where they both have to be first) and when I am depleted of energy, I get that panic feeling of “I can’t do this parenting thing…its just too hard” (anyone else feel that way?).
I have had to push myself to do the things I love… a strange state of being as I do not normally lack in the motivation department and am the sort of person that dives headfirst into projects. It has left me wondering what is going on with me. Is it a physical thing or a deeper, inner issue that is draining me of my energy? I don’t yet have an answer…but there it is…that’s me this week. Subdued…a little flat and tearful.
I am blessed with having around me an amazing bunch of creative women. This group has formed out of my neighbourhood mum friends and bloggy connections who all happen to live locally (how lucky are we?). Every two weeks, we have started meeting together for ‘creative nights’ (a revival of the creative evenings I ran in my studio last year). We take turns to host and simply bring something to make as we sit and chat.
On Friday, deeply exhausted, I plodded over to Amelia’s with my sketchbook and pens. I figured that just sitting and sketching some new designs for mosaics would do me good – don’t you find that just starting something releases energy? Tired though I was, I was grateful for the opportunity to sit with other creative and honest people, in a safe and loving space, and just make.
Tell us about your week…whether it was full of energy, jobs done and successes to celebrate….or not. There is room for all parts of us here. x
I have definately been feeling that exhaustion thing. It does finally seem to have lifted. Am so jealous of your creative evenings….. ah well I just live too far away!! I shall have to find the folk nearer by.
and have been doing very unsuccessful potty training which is driving me mad!! PArenting!! I think we have now resulted in scaring Ted off using the potty for a lot longer than if we had just started later. But we thought it was worth a try.
Oh…bless you Moyra. Potty training can be really frustrating. We tried several times with our son, in the end waited til he was nearly 3 (not sure how old your little boy is?) and still then it took longer than with our daughter. He will eventually get it. And you are so welcome to join the creative nights…if you fancy a trip to London one Friday eve! x
Potty training is a bane! My nearly two and a half year old, KJ, has no inclination towards it at all. I think the bathroom wall is paying more attention.
Yes, exhaustion is a familiar thing resulting from parenting. I've been a little crazy myself this weekend. I find that if I don't breakout of the choreline and find some time to be creative, I go a little loony.
The creative nights sound lovely. I'm thinking of starting some kind of group in my town.
You've done great this week! When I lose motivation everything goes out the window, whereas you simply kept steaming ahead. You should be proud.
Here is my entry for the week – http://ffacets.blogspot.com/2010/08/celebrating-each-step.html
I hope you feel better next week, and I'm looking forward to seeing that moonscape grouted up and complete 😀
Nutty
(who really babbles too much, sorry 🙂
I love your creative evenings!! And those sketches are gorgeous! My week has been pretty productive but i had a little incident ~ i hurt my left foot and spent most of my time rest my little feet and keeping my hands busy with sewing. 🙂 Have a lovely merry happy sunday and love to you!
I had a most horrible week at work, I was so busy every day at work I hardly had any energy to do anything, but I kept doing my art despite all of that and I'm so grateful I was able to do that. I now know that no matter what's happening in my day to day life I can still find the time and energy to create and it feels good to know that 🙂
I don't feel like I can celebrate a lot, since I just came back from a 3-week family vacation and haven't done a lick of art. But, we had a great time, I kept posting items to Etsy most days, and kept up with my blog. Tomorrow I have an art date with a friend and I'll be celebrating then! P.S. I do celebrate the relationships we've formed from the Flying Lessons group and the encouragement we give one another. Thanks so much!
I soooo love synchronicity! I was drawn to read your lovely blog Celebrating Each Step, only to discover an equally relevant issue in my life…good old potty training! How i am smiling :0) !! So i am alone neither in this creative journey nor in my 2 year old's total aversion to toilets/potties!! Aaah how my heart sighs!! x
I hope your foot is better quickly jaqueline…maybe time for lots of sewing?!
You are right Suzanne, we should stop and celebrate the beautiful and supportive connections we have made. Yup, its about our being not just our doing (keep needing to be reminded about that!) x
Sorry you had a hard work time Veronika…and we both kept on with our creativity despite it all. **Patting ourselves on the back**! Hope this week is better for you x
Hey nutty, just been over to read your Celebrating post…cool! And thank you for your encouragement x
Awww Jenny! Two year olds and potty's eh?! I still marvel that my boy 'got it'…it just seemed to not sink in for so long! Blogosphere is often a beautiful and timely reminder that we are not alone. Lovely to have you over here 🙂
I am celebrating having a REST! Finished work, one child less than usual and getting ready to go away and replenish my self!!!
Amelia.x
i will be very happy when tomorrow is over- i'm going with dad to a neurologist about his failing memory- yuck. it freaks me out. it freaks him out. so, just looking forward to that appointment, and really it being over.
You will be in my thoughts Kerri…hope the medics are good and gentle with you all. x